25 Nov Fun in Sales

Many assume that sales is a serious profession—and it certainly is. There are times when it can be very entertaining. Indeed, interacting with potential customers and learning about their company and its challenges can be enjoyable but sometimes very frustrating. Getting selected and closing a contract always gave me pleasure.

Some of my buyer contacts became personal friends, many of whom I am still in contact with years after the sale.  Listed below are some of my favorite sales anecdotes:

Where is the most unusual place where you have ever collected a contact from a customer?  Here are three of mine:

• Once, I picked up a contract from an executive at a New Year’s Eve party where I did not know anybody.  (Then I drove to the FedEx office at Chicago’s O’Hare airport and sent it in an envelope to our company’s office in the Boston area before midnight.
• A prospect once faxed me a signed contract from the ski slopes in Aspen, CO, on December 31.  He came off the slopes to sign the agreement.
• A prospect asked me if I wanted to go fishing with him at Mille Lacs, about 90 miles from the Twin Cities in MN. While on the boat in the middle of the lake, he handed me a signed contract and teasingly mentioned he would throw me overboard if I didn’t sign it.

What about some interesting or unique sales pros or prospects you have met?  Here are a few of mine:

• I had one sales pro who drove a new Rolls Royce automobile but lived in a cheap daily motel in the Los Angeles ghetto.
• Another carried a copy of his last year’s W-2 tax form to show his prospects how successful he was as a sales pro.
• And, of course, the most unusual was a sales pro who killed his wife with a bench press in their garage because of an argument, then put her in the trunk of his car and drove around all night. In the morning, he met with his manager for an account review, went to the police station, and turned himself in. He was convicted of second-degree murder and served a little more than 13 years in prison.

Sales kickoff moments:

Some of the most entertaining times are at sales kickoff meetings.  A few examples:

• I once had a salesperson wear a mask and imitate John Imlay, then the CEO of a competitor, in front of the salespeople. They responded by booing him and throwing candy.
• MSAs John Imlay once had a live tiger at a kickoff. (The tiger bit its trainer in front of the audience.) He also brought an eagle, a fox, a lion, a tiger, and even Clint Eastwood’s orangutan to the stage to wow the crowds.
• Israeli American software company NICE has hired top pop artists such as the Eagles to entertain at its sales kickoffs. Others have hired motivational speakers, such as Shark Tank’s Daymond John or Kevin O’Leary, Olympic heroes Jim Craig, Mike Eruzione, Mark Spitz, and Apollo Ohno, “Pursuit of Happyness” author Chris Gardner, former Coach Lou Holtz, and Suze Orman.
• Most salesforces have team-building activities at their sales kickoffs. These can also be fun. A favorite is “Sales Jeopardy,” or product knowledge trivia, which uses the company’s products and people to provide answers.

President’s or achievement club trips

• Many companies have sales incentive trips or prizes for their top-achieving salespeople. I have been fortunate to have gone on more than two dozen. Places visited include Hawaii, Cancun, Scottsdale, Palm Springs, Puerto Rico, Punta Cana, DR, a Panama Canal, and a Caribbean cruise. Most of the time, the spouses are invited, which is a nice reward for the person who had to accommodate the salesperson’s often chaotic travel schedule.
• Salespeople are motivated to be recognized by the company’s management and peers as one of their most successful salespeople for the past year. I have seen salespeople accomplish herculean feats, especially at the end of the year, to qualify for the club.

Sales contests

• Periodic sales contests can inject fun and energy into the sales year.

Some shocking moments:

• Once, when I was using a shared office, I overheard another salesperson tell the manager of the buyer’s contact he had been working with that he had been promised a contract by a recently deceased prospect. It was untrue. The prospect had said to him that he was no longer under consideration. He got the business and bragged about what he did to me.
• Prospects have lied to me on many occasions. Some have told me they have not decided yet, but they have. Others gave me the incorrect names of the decision makers or claimed they made the decision and did not. Others gave me misinformation about their real needs or motives to make a change. I wondered if they enjoyed wasting my time. None ever apologized for their deception.

What are some embarrassing events in sales:

• I addressed a prospect using an incorrect given name. He then told me that it was interesting that I used that name, as it was the name of his son, who had previously died.
• One of my favorite stories was included in Dan Seidman’s excellent book of more than 500 sales horror stories, Sales Autopsy.¹

Seidman tells the story of a salesperson who enters the buyer’s office and intends to build relationships with him. He notices a photo of the prospect and another person and exclaims that he is a big fan of the former football coach and broadcaster John Madden, whom he assumes is in the photo. The prospect then tells the salesperson it is his wife in the photograph.²

Funny responses to cold calls:

• I called a lead I received as a salesperson at McCormack & Dodge, a software company. When I asked the person who answered the telephone for the person on the lead, she said: “Hey George, your car is ready!”
• I also once asked for the name I received on a lead card. I called the phone number, and the person asked if I was sure that I wanted to talk to Stan.  I assured her that I did.  She said that Stan was their maintenance man.  Somebody had submitted his name as a prank.
• I also once received the name of a man who had died the previous year.

Who says salespeople can’t have some fun while doing their job? I enjoyed my time in sales, especially meeting interesting people, closing sales, and occasionally humorous and memorable moments.  I have enjoyed many long-term friendships that resulted from sales calls.

I am interested in hearing about your experiences.

Steve

¹https://salesautopsy.com/Products/Sales_Autopsy_Book/Sales_Autopsy_TOC_and_Chapter_One.pdf ( Dan Seidman, Sales Autopsy,2^nd edition,  Got Influence Press, (Barrington, IL, 2022)

² From The Sales Comic Book by Dan Seidman. For more selling blunders and the lessons learned, visit www.SalesAutopsy.com

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