06 Aug Best Advice, Worst Advice
Recently, an interviewer asked me what the best advice I had ever received was and, on the contrary, what the worst was. These were very challenging questions, and I had to ponder for quite a while to determine thoughtful answers. It was easy to think of some that were not very serious. Much of what I have been told by trusted relatives, friends, and teachers was well-meaning but not very beneficial. For example, many told me to behave better and not to talk so much in school, which seemed unachievable. Not everybody who gives you advice has the best intentions; some are self-serving, like the Wisconsin dairyman who tells you not to eat margarine because it is unhealthy. It seemed that there was usually an agenda from people that gave you unsolicited advice.
I have received great advice from relatives (especially my parents) and friends, such as:
- “Always be on ‘Lombardi time’ – 15 minutes early.”
- “Choices have consequences.”
- “If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.”
- “Find a job you enjoy doing, and you will never have to work a day in your life.” Mark Twain1 and my father.
The best advice I received was probably to understand that very few things in life are either the extremes of black or white and that there are many in the middle or gray. Many decisions or situations are complex, not dual choices, and may involve non-apparent perspectives. Often, we do not possess all the facts. Computers think in binary 0s or 1s, but humans do not. Decision-making is much easier if you see the world as black or white because there are fewer options and anxieties. It is much simpler. Being in the gray area can result in indecision.
When I was younger, especially in my late teens and twenties, I often saw the world as black or white, good or evil, or right or wrong, and most decisions seemed obvious. This was especially true in politics and social justice. Many injustices needed to be corrected immediately. They were “no-brainers.” Why wait?
When I entered the business world, I also observed many decisions that seemed obvious to me, and I couldn’t understand why the company’s executive hesitated. Also, I worked in accounting positions and put in long hours doing very difficult work, and I saw many people who didn’t seem to work very hard in their jobs but earned higher salaries than I did. I couldn’t understand why there was an imbalance of effort.
I also observed that in national and local politics, compromises must always be made to achieve one’s goals. Those compromises move one from the desired outcome to a lesser solution to achieve a consensus to move forward. So, for example, if I favored building a highway from point A to point B, I might have to adjust the route to gain more votes and get the funding approved.
The worst advice I received was that several people told me not to go into sales and stay in accounting. According to them, sales was too risky – and why take a chance when I was married and had two small children to raise?
Sales, on the other hand, involved risk. I took a cut in base salary, with most of my earnings coming from commissions on closed sales. And there was no guarantee that I would close sales. It was something that I had never done and for which I had no academic preparation. Succeeding in sales often required a very different personality than working in accounting – and I was not sure I could make the transition.
I was warned that I could fail, but I felt I could always go back to accounting if I failed. I was very acquainted with the market and the product I would sell, but I am an optimist, a MBTI ESTP, so I leaped. It took a little time for me to build up a pipeline, but I started closing sales in a few months and have never looked back at my decision.
Other bad advice I have received were:
- “Do as I say, not as I do.”
- “Follow your passion.” (If I had done that, I would be an unemployed baseball player)
- “The customer is always right.” (Nope, not always.)
Accepting to live within the grays has been valuable to my business and personal life. Perhaps my maturing process enabled me to handle it better. The gray area was often less than I had hoped for, but I have realized that it was usually an improvement over the current situation. Also, it resulted in greater acceptance by the wider group. That is often the best result in the business world, especially in sales.
1 https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/646569-find-a-job-you-enjoy-doing-and-you-will-never